Santa: A Feasibility Study

Santa: A Feasibility Study is a slideshow presentation made on December 7th of 2006 for COMM 121 class at Ferris State University. The objective of it was to take a fun look at the holiday tradition of Santa, and deconstruct it for the sake of doing so. It was produced from 2:45 AM till 9:08 AM EST of that morning, and made ready just in time for class at 9:30 AM.

Opening slide
The greatest highlight of this entire presentation was its opening. It began with a quick credit role, followed by a swinging and twirling background, followed by the "Santa" logo, followed by a list of those involved in the group. All this happened while set to the Harry Potter theme.

Who is this bearded man anyway?
From the slide itself:


 * Historically: An ill-tempered-but-generous-and-wealthy Catholic bishop
 * Mythologically:
 * Gift-giver
 * Elf
 * Immortal
 * Has legions of elves
 * Lives somewhere in North Pole
 * Has a flying sleigh with flying reindeer
 * One of the most successful film stars, period
 * According to most US markets, is really fat
 * Is typically no taller than 5’7” at very most
 * Delivers presents or coal
 * Has been in jail numerous times over misunderstandings
 * Has numerous imposters
 * Sees everything, and knows where everyone lives
 * Has met the M&M’s, who were just as shocked to meet him.

Bishop Nicholas of Myra
From the slide itself:


 * Said to have died in either 345 or 352, with an uncertain date.


 * Little is certain about his life, other than being a bishop.


 * Earned a reputation as a hothead, particularly after a supposed incident in which he attacked Arius while the latter was on trial for heresy.


 * In addition to the legend wherein which he saves a bankrupt nobleman from having to sell his daughters into prostitution, he is also reported to have saved sailors’ lives in Egypt.


 * He also supposedly revived three children that had been nearly-drowned in pickle brine barrels, supposedly by men who were hiding the kids in the barrels to cover up their crimes.


 * He is legendary for other unproven claims, such as saving three men from wrongful execution, destroying numerous pagan temples, and many other stories of bravery.


 * He supposedly died with a broken nose.

The legend around the world
This slide's entire point was to list off the different names given to Santa around the world. This includes "Christkindl" in Austria, Northern Italy, Southern Germany, and Switzerland; as well as "Ghost of the Filed" in the Alps. In Germany, he goes by Knecht Ruprecht, and has an ogre-like helper. Curiously, this depiction looks very similar to common portrayals of the Norse god Odin. Jultomten the Gnome is Santa's Swedish counterpart, and has a costume most similar to the Santa recognized in the US today.

Slightly different is the costume of Julemanden in Denmark. Poland forgoes Santa altogether, placing various angels in Santa's place. The Magi take his place in many Spanish-speaking countries. Syrians say he's a camel. A feminine version named La Befana is known in Italy. Russia also has a feminine version, known as "The Great Babushka." "Grandfather Frost" is the male version. And of course, he's called "Father Christmas" in England and France.

News flash! Santa a fake!
From the slide itself:

Nicholas’ Ghost sues Ghost of Haddon Sundblom for DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER

Santa Claus, it would seem, is a constantly-evolving Hollywood icon. In one movie after the next, this Coke-sipping fat man with an easily-distinguishable laugh is nothing more than a wool pulled over our eyes.

Now, Nicholas of Myra wants the record on his life set straight. Nicholas joined the dead some time before the year 400. He is not immortal, and therefore, cannot be the ageless, omniscient being depicted by artists such as Sundblom. He couldn’t even predict the trouble he’d get himself into when picking a fistfight with Arius the heretic. Elves? Nicholas may have known a few languages, but Quenya was not one of them. (Nor, for that matter, Klingon.)

When asked, he seemed completely unaware that there even was a 34th Street, let alone that his commercial counterpart became a movie celebrity for a “miracle” supposedly performed there, let alone who else lived there. Rudolph and Leroy were simply not to be found in his vocabulary. Nor were Donder, Blitzen or any reindeer for that matter.

The real Nicholas was also previously unaware of Coke’s touting of his image, and would not have approved of being implied in an instrumental piece by the Barenaked Ladies, etc…

Reception
The class was mildly amused by the overall presentation, though they didn't think too much of it afterwards. Nicole got nasty because the slideshow almost wasn't ready in time. And when it did arrive and did its thing, she was ungrateful. While the slideshow didn't focus as much on the deconstruction aspect as the group's actual written presentation, it did provide for some visual aids. A majority of the presentation's remainder was about the deconstruction of Santa first given by Stephen Hawking.